Feelings. Everyone has them, all the time. And yet, we don’t always acknowledge
them or talk about our feelings, much less identify emotions accurately.
Society and social media give us the message that individuals and couples should
be living a life of happiness, a life that is relatively free of dark emotions, like
anger, sadness or fear. In fact, the opposite is true: Research shows that the
happiest, most emotionally healthy people are actually the ones who are most
comfortable with the full range of their emotions.
Emotionally healthy people tend to be both self-accepting and self-aware. They
know how they feel, and they have a great deal of tolerance and self-compassion
when they’re not feeling so great emotionally. They don’t try to avoid bad feelings,
and they also know how to (gently, appropriately) support themselves through
challenging times. They know that reality is a life that is 50 – 50.
Authentic emotional health is knowing which feelings to listen to and which feelings
to leave alone. It can be hard to develop emotional health and learn how to stay in
balance between taking wisdom from your emotions, but not always “obeying them.
Learning how to tell the difference between helpful and unhelpful feelings, helps
you develop self-compassion, self-understanding, and self-control.
Personal growth and inner development include learning how to have an authentic
relationship with your own emotions. This development often addresses:
Life experiences that shaped your emotional reality and core beliefs
Acknowledging any unfinished business with the past
Figuring out which feelings are serving you and which ones are keeping you
‘stuck’
Harnessing the power of your emotions to fuel your hopes, dreams and goals
Learning how to move through big, dark emotions in a healthy way without
reacting
Learning how to become aware of your emotions and the thought that are
creating them, in the moment
This inner work often takes months of conscious, focused attention and it’s so worth
it. Learning how to manage your emotions allows you to have better relationships
with others, improve your self-esteem and create meaningful life goals.